There’s a rampant epidemic sweeping the nation as we speak — no, wait… I would venture to say that it’s sweeping the world.
One half of the population is susceptible to this epidemic, and it’s leaving the other half of the population at a loss with what to do.
It’s the Epidemic of Man-Boys.
While it can happen to any male individual, it’s most common amongst men who lacked proper initiation into manhood from their father and other significant male role models in their lives.
Unless proper time, energy, and due diligence is invested into growing up, any individual of the male species can potentially fall prey to it.
What this initiation looks like for each man is going to be different — if it happened for you, perhaps it was your father giving you a simple pat on the back and letting you know, “Son, you’re a man now.” before explaining some of the responsibility that comes with that.
For others, maybe their Uncle took them into the woods for an overnight camping mission where they got to hunt, chop wood, build a fire, etc.
However, for many, none of this happened at all.
Lack of initiation into manhood manifests in a lot of grown men who have habits of a teenager.
Any of the following are some common traits of an uninitiated man-boy:
- Inability to clean up after themselves, whether it’s their room or their dishes.
- Plays into a significant amount of enmeshment with parents beyond being under their direct care.
- Desires and feeds on codependent relationships, especially ones that are intimate in nature.
- Knows little to nothing about how to use common tools, wield basic machinery, or do much of anything that’s handy in nature.’
- Unable to be vulnerable in relationships and disguises vulnerability with machismo behaviors.
- Subconsciously creates dynamics within romantic relationships with women where they are left to mother them because they are unable to show up for basic emotional and lifestyle needs.
- Likely struggles to communicate about their feelings.
- Probably thinks their value as a man is dependent upon how big their muscles are or how well they play basketball.
- Often a love avoidant.
Guys, if your father didn’t initiate you into the world of what it means to be a man, this is your invitation to take it upon yourself to ensure it happens.
If someone isn’t going to do it for you, it becomes your responsibility.
Remaining a boy into your adulthood is keeping you small and sabotaging your intimate relationships, as well as fostering unhealthy dynamics with your parents.
For the sake of your personal empowerment, clear sense of self, relationship to and with your parents, significant other, children (current or future), and really all of your relationships — liberate yourself from boyhood and take the dive fully into manhood.